Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Minions, and why we need 'em

So here it is BOOK RELEASE DAY, one of the happiest days of the year (or three, or four, or seven of the happiest days of the year, depending on how many books/anthologies/collections you are insane enough to agree to, when you're in "sure, that would be FUN!" mode instead of "am I out of my FREAKING MIND?" mode), and all I can think about is how I need minions.

Not an assistant (have had many of those), or a secretary (ditto), or anyone for whom in any way, shape or form I need to worry about employment laws, or, you know, actual lunch breaks. No, I need a good old-fashioned minion (evil optional) who rushes to obey my every command, for fear of the death or destruction which would follow the thwarting of my wishes.

But, lacking those, I rely on my children.

Many of you are aware of my wonderful Book Release Day tradition of dragging the children on a tour of bookstores so they can OOOH and AAAH over my books. But, given their sincere and utter lack of, well, sincerity, in their previous ooohing and aaaahing, I've decided today is different.

I'm going to force them to pay me compliments. MWAH HA HA HA.

None of this pitiful "Mom, we're home from school, where is our snack?" today. No, for one precious day, it will be "Mom, we're home, can WE fix YOU a snack, in honor of release day?

"No? Would you care to relax on the couch and watch a film of your choice, without a single GAGGING NOISE during the kissing? Because you're such a brilliant writer?"

I bask, content, in the devoted attentions of my minions.

And then the alarm goes off and I wake up, bleary-eyed, minion-less, but still excited. I may not have minions, evil or otherwise, but I have the best job in the world. And today is release day. :)

PS For an excerpt, to view my astonishingly fun movie-style book trailer, and more, please visit me at www.mysterychick.com. And may you find minions of your own!!


Allison Brennan said...

Oh, to dream about minions . . . or children who get their own after-school snack!

Happy Release Day!

Colleen Thompson said...

LOL, Alesia! If you find a good source of minions, be sure to let me know.

Congratulations on the release of BLONDES HAVE MORE FELONS. I can't wait to read it!

Alesia said...

Thanks, guys!! Home from bookstore admiring and release day dinner. Minions are bathed and tucked into bed (which is another couple of things you never hear your quality evil villains doing for their minions . . .)